The First Duty of Love

Although the theologian Paul Tillich and St. Benedict lived centuries apart, they must have been kindred spirits, because Tillich told us “The first duty of love is to listen,” and St. Benedict chose “listen” as the first word of his rule. We listen to God, ourselves, and others—and God listens to all of us—because love demands it.

Doing one’s duty is not always easy. I remember becoming aware that when my St. Louis book group was having a discussion I often interrupted others, and it bothered me, because it gave the message that I believed my thoughts were more important than those of my friends. Even after becoming aware of this tendency to interrupt, changing my ways was difficult. Loving others, loving ourselves, loving God is an ongoing challenge, but we know we are on the right path when we make the effort to listen more than we speak.