Monday, July 30, 2018

Giving Without Expectation


My niece, Emma, has returned to Kansas after finishing law school in California and is in the process of setting up a new apartment, so I offered to let her look through several boxes of kitchenware I’ve had in storage since moving out of my house two years ago. She took about a third of the items, including her grandma’s 1958 Betty Crocker cookbook and teakettle.

It tugged at my heartstrings to give away some of the beautiful and well-loved items I had collected and inherited over many years. They triggered happy memories, and I hope they will now create new memories for Emma as they become part of the fabric of her life.

The experience made me reflect on what we pass on to the next generation. Whether it is our own wisdom or our possessions that we offer, those who come after us will take what they find useful or beautiful and integrate it into their own lives. They aren’t replicating our lives, so they won’t take everything, but they will take the thread of wisdom and beauty we offer and spin it in new directions, as will their children and their children’s children. In this way, in the midst of the unfolding of new life, we all remain connected—those who have gone before and those who will follow. The key is to offer what we have and then let go of how it will or will not be used, without trying to control the outcome.

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