How Do You Know God Loves You?

In one of his conferences during our 2019 retreat at the Mount, Abbot Jerome Kodell observed that throughout human history, God’s message to us is consistent: (1) I will be with you; (2) I love you; and (3) trust me.

Paul Quenon, OCSO, a monk at Gethsemane Abbey and a former directee of Thomas Merton, has helped me flesh out what it means when God says to me, “I love you.” In his book In Praise of the Useless Life: A Monk’s Memoir, Quenon relates this story: “One time he [Merton] asked me, ‘How do you know God loves you?’ I fumbled out some vague reply. He said, ‘You know God loves you because he brought you here and takes care of you.’”

I considered how I would answer the question, “How do you know God loves you?”

• My first thought was that I know God loves me because God created me, and everything God does is done out of love. Fair enough—but that can be said of everyone.

• Well, I also know God loves me because of God’s self-revelation through creation and specifically through Jesus. That’s true, but again, it could be said of everyone.

• Okay, how about this: I know God loves me because he has given me teachers and friends to guide me, inspire me, and provide comfort and companionship. That feels more personal—that God has chosen these particular, extraordinary people to be my companions.

• And then there’s this: I know God loves me because God gives me challenges that increase my wisdom and insight. It is clear that these challenges are designed specifically for me with an understanding of what I need to grow.

• Even more intimately, I know God loves me because of the desire that has been planted within me to know God.

• Which leads, coincidentally, to the same reply Merton gave Quenon: “You know God loves you because he brought you here [to the monastery] and takes care of you.”

Knowing God’s individual, personal, intimate love for us helps us accept the other parts of God’s message: “I will be with you” and “trust me.”

So. How do you know God loves you?