First, testing positive for the virus was humbling, as I realized I had harbored a reservoir of pride for being uninfected for so long. I have now joined the 676 million other people in the world who have been ill with COVID and have had to deal with unpleasant and sometimes life-threatening symptoms, the need to take time off from work and family responsibilities, and worry about long-term consequences of the virus. This experience has increased my compassion for others who have been affected by COVID and appreciation of my own human vulnerability.
Second, because I have access to a laptop computer and the internet, I continued to work several hours a day during my time of quarantine, despite feeling sick. This accessibility to technology led me to contemplate my relationship with work. Again, the issue of pride surfaced. Is my work so important that I can’t turn off the computer for a few days when I’m ill? Technology provides a tool for staying connected to others and for entertainment as well as for work, but it is my responsibility to make healthy decisions about how and when to use it.
Third, quarantining with other sisters helped me appreciate the support we receive in community. Those of us who tested positive for the virus were provided with a comfortable space in our guest quarters to recuperate, and meals were delivered to us three times a day. Sisters in the monastery sent cards and treats, and rather than feeling isolated, those of us in isolation built camaraderie by sharing stories of life in community, watching a KC Chiefs playoff game together, and offering each other sympathy and assistance. St. Benedict says in his Rule that care of the sick must come before all else, and being infected with the COVID virus allowed me to experience the blessing of that piece of wisdom.
Illness is a challenging aspect of being human, but as with most things we encounter in life, it can instruct us in the practice of humility, discernment, and gratitude.
You are fortunate to have comfortable lives. I have seen terrible hardships and horrors, such deep suffering inflicted by the pandemic on so many. Best wishes.
ReplyDeleteYes, we are very fortunate to have comfortable lives, thanks to the hard work of previous generations of sisters. We had the resources and support to avoid infection with the virus during the early part of the pandemic, but I know it was horrible for so many families and health care workers who suffered so much. I continue to pray for those who are still grieving and facing disability and financial/educational setbacks.
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