Finding My Voice

I was a shy child—it took me a long time to “find my voice.” Even now, when I get sick, the illness often starts with a sore throat. Clearly, this is a vulnerable area for me. It’s interesting, though, how God works through our vulnerabilities. The way I found my voice was through writing, which is now one of my strengths. I was also given many opportunities to practice public speaking when I was a parishioner at St. Cronan in St. Louis, and now I am comfortable in front of a microphone. Although it goes against our instincts, working with our vulnerabilities can lead us to discover our greatest gifts.

Lately I have been studying the practice of lectio divina. First, I read a chapter on sacred reading in the book Monastic Practices by Charles Cummings, in which he recommends reading scripture aloud and slowly. Then I watched a video on lectio divina by Sr. Lucy Wynkoop, who recommends that we “read the text aloud, slowly, vocalizing words to engage the lips, eyes, and ears, letting the sound of the words hum within us and letting our throats and lungs sustain our breath.” Then I read in A Book of Wonders by Edward Hays, “If Christians, as well as Muslims, Jews, and Buddhists, wish to find the treasures hidden in their sacred texts, they should read them slowly and aloud, as if they were children once again.… What you read aloud, hear as being spoken to you exclusively by the Divine Author of all holy books.”

Because I received these three instructions in the course of just two days, I’m inclined to believe I am now being called to use my voice in my lectio practice. I’m sure it will feel odd at first. However, it appears that the call to work with the vulnerability of my voice—and, in turn, my other vulnerabilities as well—is going to be a lifelong process!