From Your Lips to My Heart

Henri Nouwen said, “Jesus was all ear.” Gospel stories about Jesus indicate that he gave his full attention to whatever person was before him; thus he was able to read people’s hearts, intuit what was troubling them, and discern their particular need for healing.

It is difficult for us to give that level of attention to the people we encounter. Without even realizing it, we are formulating an answer as others are talking, which prevents us from being fully present to them. Listening requires being comfortable with silence after someone speaks, so we can absorb and reflect on what was said before we respond. We are lucky if we have someone in our lives who can model being all ear for us.

My Uncle Barney was such a person for me. He was a shy bachelor farmer who lived alone for many years after my grandmother died. When I visited him, we sat in his cool, musty living room, and after one of us made a comment, two or three minutes would pass before a response was made. The long stretches of silence didn’t make me anxious; on the contrary, I found it very restful to be with him, and I discovered that talking is not a necessary aspect of being present to someone.

We live in a noisy world. When we are able to quiet ourselves through prayer, time in nature, and the creation of art, we can give others a gift they seldom receive—we can listen to them so that what they say doesn’t go out our other ear but into our heart.